


About Face

by dralexreid



Series: Dr Piper Bishop [10]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Blood and Injury, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:48:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27042241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dralexreid/pseuds/dralexreid
Summary: The BAU travels to Dallas to assist in the search for a murderer who scares his victims with "missing" flyers that display the soon-to-be victims' photos. SSA David Rossi returns to the BAU from retirement. An agent gets seriously injured.
Relationships: Dr Spencer Reid/Dr Piper Bishop
Series: Dr Piper Bishop [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1972852
Kudos: 29





	About Face

Prentiss, Morgan and Bishop were the earliest ones there that morning. Morgan had brought in doughnut holes and Piper took the jammy delicacies, catapulting them successively into his jaw. The 7th one in a row earned a cheer from everyone except Prentiss who had her eye caught by something entering the bullpen between shots. Piper missed her next shot as she focused on the figure drawing up behind Morgan as he ‘grooved‘ in victory. The outline of Frankenstein hovered above Derek’s ear before yelling at the top of his lungs.

“Jesus, Reid.” Derek took a deep breath as Emily and Piper laughed.

“Happy All Hallows Eve folks! To paraphrase from Celtic mythology, tomorrow night all order is suspended, and the barriers between the natural and the supernatural are temporarily remooooved!”

“That right there’s why I hate Halloween.”

“Amen,” Piper held out her hand that Derek slapped, laughing at the sheer outrage on Spencer’s face.

“Why?”

“It creeps me out.”

“You’re scared?!” Piper looked at him shocked.

“I didn’t say I was scared, I said it creeps me out.”

“Pipes, why don’t you like Halloween?” Emily switched the conversation, easily catching the voodoo doll Spencer threw to her.

“I just don’t. What creeps you out about Halloween, Derek?”

“I don’t know. People wearing masks. I don’t like folks in disguises.”

“What?” Reid exclaimed. “That’s the best part about Halloween! You can be anyone you wanna be.”

“Nah, I’m pretty good just being me.”

“Why is it that none of those views surprises me?” Emily scoffed, returning to her stack of paperwork.

“You know what, though? On the flip side, it does provide a pretty good reason to cozy up with a scary flick and a little Halloween honey.” Derek clicked his tongue and shot a finger gun at Emily.

“Derek, I think you somehow made Halloween worse. So, thanks.” Piper jammed the last doughnut hole in her mouth before returning to her desk adjacent to Reid’s.

“Guys, he’s here,” Reid whispered excitedly.

“Who’s here?” Piper asked, smoothing out her hair immediately. She watched an ageing man walk in behind a marching Erin Strauss up to Hotch’s office, glancing at Reid smilingly at the getup. Reid hastily took off the mask as the rest of the team watched the man disappear into Hotch’s office. “Who’s he?”

“The lord and saviour of criminal profiling. David Rossi. Sold millions of books.” Reid answered as he pulled the noose over his head, draping it over Piper. She pulled it off immediately, discarding it on her desk. 

“You know that Frankenstein was the doctor, not the green monster, right? Mary Shelley used him as a vessel in which to explain the repercussions of scientific innovation that doesn’t consider moral or ethical practices…” She trailed off from her conversation as Hotch approached them with Rossi. 

“Team, meet SSA David Rossi. Dave, this is SSA Emily Prentiss, SSA Derek Morgan.” He paused to let him shake hands with the two agents before letting Piper introduce herself. 

“Hi, Dr Piper Bishop, this is Dr Spencer Reid.”

“Good to meet you.”

“Sir, if I could talk to you later about your work with the Scarsdale skinner. Psycho-linguistics is an incredibly dynamic field, and the fact that your profile of his reading habits ultimately led to his capture is something I find so incredibly intrig-”

“Reid, slow down. He’ll be here a while and JJ’s waiting for us.” Piper hid a small smile as she followed Emily, with the boys behind her, Derek playfully slapping Spencer. 

They sat in the conference room, going through the case. One woman, brutally murdered and sexually assaulted with missing posters stuck up in her own house and a mask with the word “One” etched on it in blood. As the body flashed onto the screen and Piper flinched, Penelope walking in at the same time. She yelled, pulling her file in front of her face. “Dear God, what is that?”

“Technical analyst, Penelope Garcia, this is SSA David Rossi.”

“Is it gone, JJ?” Penelope quickly greeted the older agent and left apologising profusely. Until she came back in to hand Hotch the file she came in for. 

Piper smiled as she listened to Reid’s explanation of the false face mask and Emily’s preliminary identification of the killer as a textbook sadist. Having covered the case, Hotch dismissed them all, telling them to meet at the jet.

^-^

Spencer moped as he perused through the files. Piper threw hers on the table. “Okay, Reid, spill. What’s wrong?” Emily raised an eyebrow in piqued interest.

“Nothing, I just had plans tonight.”

“For Halloween, I presume.”

“Yeah, I had tickets to the original Dracula.”

“If it makes you feel any better, the way Halloween is celebrated today has no historical merit to it.”

“I may regret asking this,” Emily started, “But what do you mean?”

“Well, like Spencer said this morning, All Hallows’ Eve was the last day where spirits could take vengeance on their enemies, so to protect themselves, the people in both colonial America and England would disguise themselves and in France, they’d visit the graves of their lost loved ones with dishes of milk. Similarly, in Italy, some families left a large meal out for ghosts of their passed relatives. And now, it’s known as the day when kids eat too much candy and dress up as anything they want.”

“So you didn’t have plans?”

“Nah, I had to cancel my ticket to Macbeth. They wouldn’t even compensate for the ticket.”

“Damn,” Morgan said sardonically and Piper shoved him.

“Children, behave.” Hotch scolded. “Let’s take a look at victimology.” He beckoned at Rossi to join them. JJ stood with her cup of coffee, silently observing her team and their newest member discuss the case. 

“So, we know there’s some kind of fixation with the face. He asks ‘Have you seen me?‘ on the fliers and he then removes the face of our victim.” Morgan says, turning to their resident geniuses to fill in the blanks.

“Well, oftentimes throughout literature, faces are often linked with the pretences people pander to in modern society," Piper announced. "In fact, an iconic line from TS Eliot is about preparing a face to meet the faces that you meet. In Roman mythology, Janus is the god with two faces, which incidentally has nothing to do with being two-faced. He’s more about the duality between right and wrong, between the future and the past.”

“The point, Bishop?” Morgan huffed.

“Sorry. The point being that betrayal is often linked with faces. Maybe the unsub feels betrayed by this woman.”

“So, we’re looking for a personal link?”

“I’d say so,” Reid agreed.

“Interesting,” Rossi muttered, eyes focused on his notebook.

“Something to add, Dave?” Hotch looked towards his old friend. He simply shook his head and Emily shrugged before delving into Michelle Colucci’s life. She was single, lived alone, no boyfriend and no ex-husband. She was an architect. Friends and co-workers said she was a class workaholic, a loner who rarely went out of the house. So she’s extremely low risk.

“The guy was either a stalker or knew her personally,” Hotch inferred before turning to Piper.

“Do we get a list of all the people in her life? Can we rule out a gender?”

“Females are almost never this violent to another female.”

“You clearly haven’t watched the Kardashians.” Piper scoffed at Morgan.

“What’s the Kardashians?” Reid asked quietly.

“You don’t want to know,” Piper muttered back darkly, trauma evident in her eyes. Spencer raises his eyebrows and returns to the case as she got up to make a cup of tea. 

^-^

Bishop hated disposal sites. Finding the body of a woman they couldn’t save unsettled her. Gave her a responsibility to make sure she didn’t die in vain. She saw the same pain in Rossi as they trudged through the greenery towards the river. She faintly heard the conversation between Rossi and Reid and she felt her boots squish through the quagmire. “Dr Reid, do we still keep all the old files in the fourth-floor storeroom?” 

“I think some are up there. You know, most of our information’s gone digital now.” 

“Right.” 

“Have you had a chance to go through our data since you’ve been back?” 

“Not yet.” 

“You’ll be amazed. The original team– I mean, you interviewed something like, uh, 45 serial killers, right?”

“Something like.”

“Today we have interviews with over 1,000 offenders. Serial killers, child abductors, sex offenders– I’ll go through it with you sometime if you like, answer any questions–”

“Sounds good.” They came to a halt and stood in the shade over the river. Rossi walked along the side of it, thinking out loud. He reminded Piper of Gideon, but something was different. “Water. Obliterates a body… Destroys evidence. But you weren’t in the water that long, were you, Michelle?"

"She had rocks tied to her to weigh her down," Spencer surmised. "She floated to the surface before there was any other damage.”

"Just what was done to her already." Piper's tone was sullen.

Back at the precinct, Piper entered the station with a tray of coffee cups, Rossi sat in a corner scribbling in his notebook. Reid flicked through security footage as Hotch and JJ marched back in. “We got anything?” He looked directly at David, who stopped scribbling but revealed nothing else. 

“Agent Rossi pointed out that since the victims were weighted down, it suggests the unsub didn’t want them found," Reid reported. "It suggests some sort of connection between them.”

“Maybe he thought he was saving them for himself, or he was trying to spare their dignity. Either way, he feels connected to this woman.” Piper said, handing JJ her hazelnut coffee. An officer from the department approached the lead detective, informing him about the woman waiting to speak with them. They heard Enid White’s voice break over the line as she gave them the address she was hiding out in. Except the room in the motel was empty, save for the dozen missing posters on the desk. Piper held a poster in her gloved hand.

“I can hear your gears clicking from waay over here Pipes. What you got?” Emily asked from the corner of the room.

“The pictures.” Piper murmured, glancing over at Emily before whipping out her cell to call Garcia.

“ _Your queen awaits her audience.”_ Piper couldn’t help smiling.

“Well, your Majesty, the pictures on these missing person posters look kind of grainy and I think he tried to use some photo-editing software. Any magic in those fingers, my most ardent monarch?”

_“I shall be with you forthwith.”_

“I anticipate your communication with utmost fidelity. Piper out.” She switched off her cell, disposing of it in her pocket, then glanced at Emily’s raised eyebrow. “I’ve been reading a lot of Romantic literature this week. Trying to offset Reid’s Halloween spirit.“

“Yeah, why don’t you like Halloween?”

“A woman’s missing Em. You really wanna talk about this?”

“Don’t try to guilt me. How did Halloween hurt you?” Piper swiped her tongue across her lip, checking to see if anyone with even a semblance of professionalism was near.

“Every Halloween, my siblings always wanted to go trick-or-treating. My father never bought us costumes either nor the materials to make them.” She sighed, carding her hand through her hair. “So I’d use the money I earned from my job down at the coffee shop to buy body paint and pirate hats. And my mom would always cover us. One year, Danny left the group and I couldn’t find him. I dropped Lucy home and searched all night. Turned out he stayed back at this kid’s house because he didn’t want to come home. Said he liked Halloween so much because he could be a Cyberman instead of being Daniel Bishop, son of Detective Leo Bishop. Except the night was so cold that he got the flu. My father pinned it all on me for entertaining their petty desires," she scoffed. "I blame Halloween because it’s easier to blame the day than myself or my father.” Emily was silent, probably because she wasn’t expecting something so personal. 

“I think that’s the beauty of Halloween. The escape from boredom. Maybe Daniel wanted to escape being a detective’s son and just be a kid. And if anything, you helped in that.” Piper gave Emily a grudging smile before leaving the house. 

At the precinct, Piper grasped her tea in one hand, tapping her fingers on the table as Morgan started to deliver the profile. “There is a sophistication in what this unsub does that suggests a level of maturity. We believe this puts his age in the mid-30s to 40s range.”

“Michelle Colucci was taken from the primary crime scene and disposed of at the tertiary crime scene 4 days later.” Reid continued. “That means she was held somewhere for at least 3 days. You can’t really just hold a victim anywhere for days on end, so he most likely has access to a house of some kind.” 

“And he’s also fairly tech-savvy,” Morgan pointed out. “The fliers were made on a computer. And it’s probable that he used a device to intercept Enid White’s phone call.” 

“Witnesses in Ms White’s neighbourhood say they may have seen a white man putting up fliers, but none of them could describe him, even with all the media attention this case has received,” Hotch elaborated. 

“Great.” A detective scoffed.

“Actually, what that tells us is that there is absolutely nothing remarkable about this man. He is exceedingly average,” Prentiss communicated. “As you said, Detective Yarbrough, average height, average build.” 

“It extends to his professional life as well,” Bishop continued. “He most likely works in a field where he doesn’t stand out doesn’t really make a mark. His lack of distinction is part of his psychopathy. We have hundreds of interactions with people every day. Most of those involve someone overlooking someone else.”

“Most of us don’t pay any attention to being ignored, but to this kind of unsub, each oversight is intentional. Especially when it comes from his object of sexual desire. He begins to obsess over her until she’s all he can think about. And the rage builds until he has to attack that person,” Hotch finished.

“So he’s pissed off that nobody notices him?” the lead detective asked sardonically.

“Have you seen me?” Piper recited. 

“Wait. That’s not about the women?”

“No. The masks are about women. He cuts off their faces, replacing them with an expressionless white mask, reducing them to a number. He’s transferring the pain of invisibility onto these women. It gives him a sense of power and the power can make him arrogant, but it doesn’t make him notable.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means,” Hotch intervened, “He’ll contact us. Thus far, he’s wanted the police to see him. He isn’t going public. Hopefully, by playing on his anger-” Hotch trailed off, glancing at the mask on the news channel. “JJ, how’d they get that?” JJ could sense the anger seeping into his voice.

“Hotch, I swear… I-I contacted all the local PDs and stressed withholding the information about the masks. I don’t know-” Piper heard JJ trail off as Rossi walked in with his notebook, glancing nonchalantly at the screen.

“Oh, I gave it to them.” Piper blinked. Derek stared. Spencer twitched his eyebrows and stared at the floor. Emily refused to make eye-contact as the team heard Hotch about to blow up.

“Dave, can I talk to you a minute?” As they left, Piper let out a breath.

“Hotch is gonna kill him,” Piper murmured to Derek.

“20 bucks he makes Rossi quit.” Piper slapped his outstretched hand.

“You’re on.” She hid her smile gracefully behind her cup of tea as she returned to her perch on the table.

^-^

“Why would you do that?” Hotch gritted his teeth as he asked the senior agent politely.

“It’ll make him contact us. He’s screaming for it.” 

“We aren’t prepared.” 

“Prepared?”

“We need to set up a trap and trace.” 

“Trap and trace? They never stay on the phone long enough for that.” 

“Dave, they’re a lot faster than they used to be. We also need to prep the detective on what to say to him.” 

“He’s not gonna want to talk to the detective. He’s gonna want to talk to the FBI.” 

“We don’t step over the local police like that.” 

“They called us in.” 

“Yes, but if the perception is that we’re to embarrass the locals by telling the media that we’re gonna fix things, then they’ll stop calling us.” Hotch tried to explain.

“Relax, Hotch. I’ve got this.”

“You see, that’s the problem, Dave. There is no I. We function as a team.” 

“I’ve been doing this before you were out of high school, probably before the rest of your team was in school at all.” 

“I know that. Things have changed.” 

“The bells and whistles changed. An unsub is still an unsub, and I know how to deal with an unsub.” 

“No, Dave, it’s not just that.” Their argument was short-lived as JJ interrupted them, telling them that Garcia found something. 

As they came back outside, Rossi was confused by Piper’s outstretched hand and Derek’s reluctant $20 bill exchange. There was a lot to learn about this team. In their small space, they gathered around the conference table as Rossi stood staring at their crime board.

 _“Michelle Colucci recently drew up the plans for a remodel of 3 floors of a company called Techco Communications. It’s a high-tech communications company in downtown Dallas._ ”

“And Enid White?” Derek asked.

_“Worked there until 2 months ago.”_

“Thanks, sugar plum.” Piper looked up as the detective walked in, alerting them to their unsub on line 2, demanding to speak with the FBI.

Rossi looked at Hotch. Hotch looked at Rossi. Piper stared at the landline, determined not to make eye contact with either. Rossi pressed the phone and introduced himself. As the unsub whispered through the phone to Rossi, Rossi raised his voice higher.

“You won’t inspire fear, you’ll inspire hatred and ridicule, because the only power someone like you has is a mask, and once that mask is removed, you’ll be as insignificant as you’ve always been– a loser!”

Piper’s eyes widened and Derek’s eyebrow hovered upwards. Silence followed as the group waited for the response.

“ _You just signed Enid White’s death warrant._ ” The line went dead as Hotch and Rossi’s eyes sparred over the last few minutes. Derek slapped the table as he got up from the group and Piper chewed on her bottom lip. Spencer stared at his shoes until Hotch told them to gear up to catch this son of a bitch. A few minutes later, Piper sat uncomfortably next to Rossi in the back of Hotch’s SUV, wishing to God she was with anyone else. 

“Lieutenant, I need you to lock the TechCo building down tight. Nobody in, nobody out. It’s vital.” Hotch turned off the radio, slipping it onto the dashboard before turning to Rossi. “Rossi, you really think the unsub’s still gonna be there after that call?”

“Of course. He thinks he has all the time in the world.” 

“You think they got an image off of the police security camera yet?” Piper asked them, trying to diffuse the situation.

“The security camera doesn’t work. I lied about that,” Rossi confessed, causing Piper to mentally throw up her hands and resume her gaze out the window. 

“You lied about that?” Hotch exclaimed, eyes still on the road. There was definitely anger in his tone now.

“He doesn’t know.”

“Dave, that was incredibly reckless.”

“Hotch, he didn’t weigh the body down well.” 

“What do you mean?” 

“He didn’t want Michelle found so quickly. He screwed that up. This kind of guy, when he plans something, if he has the time, if he’s in control, he’s meticulous. But being on the edge of the river, out in the open, he was not in control. He was in a hurry, and he made a mistake,” Rossi explained in his silky voice. 

“That’s what you’re hoping.” 

“Trust me. With an unsub like this, you need to throw him off his game. His hand needs to be forced.” 

“I know that Dave, but the point is, you did it by forcing ours.” Piper crossed and uncrossed her leg, begging to be closer to the building. 

Her prayers were soon answered and she rushed towards Derek and the others. The group walked into the building, Piper’s hand instinctively went near her gun. She relaxed as she felt Spencer standing near her. “Michelle remodelled levels 7, 8 and 9. Morgan, take 7. Prentiss, 8, Reid and Bishop take 9. We’ll be here in the lobby. We’re looking for a rank-and-file employee who made a scene in the last 20 minutes or was here and gone.” Prentiss had no luck as did Morgan. Bishop and Reid reported back to Hotch that they found his desk. Reid started rummaging through the desk, looking for any type of clue while Piper connected the laptop to Garcia. 

“Spence!” Piper called to him, pointing to Michelle’s poster. She flipped open her cell, reporting him. They rushed downstairs through the elevator, Piper tapping her foot as she stared at the silver doors, pulling her gun out. The doors opened and the first thing she registered was a yell. She froze but he didn't. Before she knew what she'd done, Piper pulled an arm out, shoving Spencer back inside, backing out of the elevator. Her head swivelled at the sound of a whip cracking, registering the suited man with a gun aimed at Rossi. Her training kicked in and she ducked, aiming her own gun at his thigh, a bullet ripping through his thigh so that he crumpled. She heaved in exertion, turning to smile at Spencer in the elevator. But blood leached out of his face and she felt something warm trickle down her arm like a tear but thicker. She looked down at her arm and panic settled in as Hotch dialled an ambulance.

Reid mulled over what had happened as he sat next to the young agent in the ambulance. He should have done something. He should have stepped out first or pulled her back.

Instead, Piper lay in the ambulance, a bullet lodged in her shoulder, wincing as she gripped Spencer’s hand. “Jesus, they don’t show this bit in movies.” She tried to breathe, her shirt stained with blood.

“Stop talking.”

“You know better than to tell me that Spence. I’m just glad I wore a dark shirt today. No idea how I’m gonna get the blood out.” She winced harder this time, cursing herself for the whimper she let out. _Stop it. The guy holding your hand was tortured. You got shot in the shoulder. Stop your whinging._

 _“_ Just relax, please.” Piper felt her eyes closing, the pain unbearable. She tried to chuckle but all that came out was a grimace.

“Try to talk to me like I’m gonna live, Reid. Give me one of those statistics on shoulder gunshot wounds.”

“39,773 persons died from firearm-related injuries in the United States.” She slapped his arm weakly.

“Good statistics, Dr Reid. Good statistics,” she murmured.

“Out of almost 400 million, Dr Bishop. Not even 1%.” But her eyes had already closed and Spencer felt his eyes water as he pressed her hand to his lips. He imagined what she would’ve said.

“ _What happened to the sheer amount of germs that can be exchanged through hands?” She’d joke._

_“It’s safer to kiss, remember.” He’d retort.  
_

He watched helplessly as she was rushed into surgery and he raised his cell to his ear. “Yeah, they took her into surgery…Good. Thanks.”

He plopped down, staring at a blank wall. Something was wrong. He’d known Hotch, Derek and Elle for 4 years, 6 months, 28 days and 45 hours. He’d known JJ for 2 years, 10 months, 24 days and 12 hours. He’d known Emily for 1 year, 7 months, 18 days and 5 hours. And yet, he didn’t know how long he knew Piper. All he knew was what knowing her felt like. It felt like sunshine after a cloudy day. It felt like moments, not minutes. He knew she’d survive, but his heart still weighed in his chest. Why did he feel so bad about her taking a bullet? _It wasn’t meant for her._ _It was meant for Rossi._ He shook his head and reached for his satchel, only to remember he left it in the car. He pulled out his cell again, this time telling Morgan to bring his satchel.

Hours passed. Hotch just stood there, watching his team try to stop themselves fall apart. Reid was asleep, Garcia was tapping her foot impatiently with a box of cookies in her hand. “ _She just went through surgery Hotch. A bullet went through her- ugh I can’t even say it. I don’t care what the doctor says. She gets a cookie,_ ” she’d said to him.

Rossi was pacing. _The kid was stupid. Why take the bullet?_ Hotch had told her to get down but she still stood, taking the bullet on the way. _That was reckless._

 _The good things, Derek, remember the good things._ He chuckled as he sat Emily down and told her the time he’d made tea for her and had forgotten the sugar. He told her about her excitement over little things, like Anderson’s dog who was brought in because he’d gotten his certificate and their little bets over trivial things. Who can make Hotch smile the fastest? Who can make Garcia the angriest in a day? “ _That girl knows how to have fun without a drink,_ ” he’d said.

JJ was on her fifth cup of coffee, adamant to stay awake long enough to see her safe. She hated these moments. Waiting. Watching. Knowing she couldn’t do anything. She remembered Hotch’s offer to become a profiler, how she’d declined it immediately. She was happy being the communications liaison. But she didn’t want to be helpless.

The doctor came out, telling them they could see her. Hotch gently woke Reid up and Garcia rushed to Piper’s side where she would stay until Derek had to pull her away. Piper smiled. “How is it that I’m the one who’s shot, but you all look worse than I do?”

“Oh don’t make me hit you,” Penelope warned.

“How’s Enid?” The agent looked to Hotch, hoping that the other woman was okay.

“She’ll be fine. You should be worried about yourself.”

“Eh,” she waved, turning her head to JJ. “You know what happened in the ambulance?” Spencer’s breath hitched. _Not the hand thing…_ “I told him to tell me a statistic about gunshot wound recoveries. He tells me that over 39 and a half thousand died in the US alone.” She chuckled to herself. “What happened to Max?”

“He’s dead,” Rossi stated before going to walk away.

“Agent Rossi!” Piper called out, trying to get up, wincing as her shoulder gave her a pang of pain. “Can I talk to you, sir?” She leaned against her pillows as Hotch ushered them all out.

“How are you feeling kiddo?”

“Like I got shot.” Piper grimaced and Rossi helped her get comfortable. “Can I ask you something?”

“Shoot.” _Shit_. Piper raised an eyebrow and smirked.

“A little early for the puns, Agent Rossi.”

“Rossi’s fine, please.”

“Why didn’t you tell the team your plan?”

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t mean to be impolite, sir, but don’t you think things would have gone…a lot smoother if we’d all been prepared?” Rossi snorted sarcastically.

“I’m sorry.” He looked at her levelly. “I’m used to working alone.”

“Can I say something, sir? Everyone on this team has a niche. Derek used to be a police officer, worked in the bomb squad. His experience is an asset. Emily speaks who knows how many languages and she’s really good at spotting behavioural tics. As for Reid, I’m 80% sure he has all your books and biography memorised and he reads traffic pattern reports as a hobby. Garcia makes mean cookies and can find dirt on you you didn’t even know existed. JJ is the one who makes sure we sound coherent to the other officers and Hotch makes sure we don’t kill each other in the process. Basically, sir, we’re assets. You’ll find us far more useful than hindering.” He simply nodded at her words.

“What about you?” Piper chuckled.

“I look pretty in a hospital gown and I take bullets for people. Also, I’m a sucker for cookies.” Rossi scoffed before pressing his lips to her forehead.

“Get well soon.” Piper lay her head back and closed her eyes, opening them to see Dr Reid.

“Hey, Doc. What’s wrong with me?”

“You have a case of I’m-so-stupid-I-take-a-bullet-for-anyone-itis.”

“Oh no!” Piper exclaimed in mock worry. “How do I get rid of it?” She pressed her palms to her cheeks.

“I’m afraid it’s lifelong. There’s no cure for it.” Piper snorted. “Seriously, how are you?”

“I am tired, hungry and need a cup of tea all at the same time. Is that possible?”

“Lucky for you, I’m here. I stole you a few cookies before Garcia could give them all away. Also,” he added while she bit into the soft cookie. “She named them chocolate thunder.” Piper choked. “Kidding, breathe. And here.” He handed her a cup of tea. 

“You remembered the milk and sugar. Oh, I love you.” She reached up to kiss his cheek, grimacing as she lay back down on the bed, oblivious to the blush rising on Spencer’s face. Spencer got up and went to leave, bumping into the glass door on the way out. As he heard her giggle, he turned and waved awkwardly back at her. Piper waved back and sipped on her tea. _Perfectly balanced._

Garcia walked in after he left, pointing at him, then her, then him again. “Does he-”

“Don’t look at me like that.”


End file.
